Reminiscing

Hi friends!

I hope after you see my high school memory, you will be inspired to share yours with me too. So feel free to send me one of your high school pics along with a current pic. Have you changed much? I have.

Here is a high school pic of me in an old yearbook. This was probably my senior year. It was a college info day. I was at the Marine’s recruiting table😂😂😂. Interestingly enough, I did not join the Marine’s.

Photo: Plainview High School Yearbook

However, Petty Officer Trent Miller, a U.S. Armed Forces Recruiter, did a swell job of convincing me to join the United States Navy. Hoorah!

I desperately wanted to be a (JO) in the Navy. In civilian terms that’s a journalist. But that ASVAB exam kicked my butt. It was seriously the most challenging exam I ever took. And I took many, including: the PSAT, the SAT, and the ACT. The ASVAB by far, gave me the most massive migraine imaginable.

My scores didn’t rank high enough for me to choose (JO) which was soul crushing, because I could imagine myself being a reporter in the Navy and working for the The Flagship or the Navy Times, two military newspaper publications. But seriously the exam tested things I was absolutely ignorant about such as; Electronic Information, Automotive and Shop Information, Mechanical Comprehension, and Assembling Objects.

I did the next best thing I could do, I became a culinary specialist in the Navy and earned my $30,000 Navy College Fund.🎓 I have a picture somewhere. I was holding a giant jumbo check like a lotto winner photo. 😂😂😂. I’ll have to look for it and post it at a later time.

So, after I graduated from Plainview High School, in Plainview Texas in May of 2000, I went to bootcamp in Great Lakes, Illinois.

After my graduation from bootcamp, I went to Culinary A School, in San Antonio, Texas at Lackland Airforce Base.

Following Culinary A School, I received orders to the fleet in Norfolk, Virginia. I survived 4 years in the USN from June 11,2000 to June 11,2004 of active duty. I participated in sea trials and was an original plankowner on the USS IWO JIMA (LHD-7), an amphibeous assault ship that carries approximately 3,000+ Marines and Sailors aboard this little “floating city.”

I got married, thus our marital status changed to dual military. And my orders were changed to shore duty. And I worked the other end of my occupation which was hotel management. Although military jargon describes these facilities as, barracks (not hotels). These barracks are typically for active duty stationed personnel. Mostly shore duty personnel.

Soon after I became pregnant with my first daughter in 2000 ( I was 19 years of age). I delivered her at Portsmouth Naval Hospital. Virginia.

I got married. (That was my first marriage).

I got pregnant again later with my second daughter (I was 21). Once again I delivered my baby girl at Portsmouth Naval Hospital.

Unfortunately for me, my first husband (now ex) divorced me, and abandoned his two daughters. ☮of💩!(My daughter’s gave me permission to put that, sorry, not sorry!)

Then at age 22 I received an honorable discharge. Afterwards, I went back to my hometown as a sorrowful and brokenhearted divorced mother, of two little princesses. I tried to put the pieces of my life together again.

They are the most amazing little girls in the world, so it wasn’t too hard to be happy.

It has been a bumpy ride, but we’re still going.

Here is me now!💋 See pic below. Life has been rough for me. Pero like mi papi taught me; sigo adelante!

Post your pics below in the comments or share them on my Facebook page with the #Reminiscing.

Contact me at either of these emails:

dstatam63@bethelu.edu

candidchicana@gmail.com

Aspiring Artists, Daring to Dream & Creating Compelling Content

I bought two 📚 books by New York Times Best-Selling Author John. C. Maxwell at the Thrift Store where I am currently employed as a Cashier/Shift Manager.

They are titled: The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, and Put Your Dreams To The Test: 10 Questions to Help You See It and Seize It.

I can not wait to delve into them. But I am so excited about a little excerpt from the dreams book. I’m a firm believer in sharing things that I find valuable. And so I want to share this excerpt with all of you.

But before I share that excerpt, let me just say that I am a novice blogger, a writer. I’m sorta learning as I go. Winging it! I am trying to “build a new identity” as the writer that I believe I am!(Scott, Steve)

And so obviously my goal is to perfect my own art of crafting compelling content. I‘m a writer. I worry more about my content than my grammar because I want what I create, to reproduce seeds of knowledge. It is summed up well with a quote I saw on a Facebook meme yesterday. It read,

“Write what should not be forgotten.”

-Isabel Allende

(Meme Photo Source Credit: The Writer’s Circle)

My self fulfilling prophecy is to become a Master Storyteller. I am ready to put in the hours, sweat, blood, or tears necessary to achieve this.

I heard Mark Cuban talking on an interview video this morning and he said something that registered with me.He was referring to content on real time social media. He said that on this new media landscape, critics have the platform to say, “oh he is an idiot” or, “she knows her stuff” or in my case,”her writing is mediocre” or, “she’s only a cashier, she doesn’t know anything”.

But guess what? If it gets them talking…then I’m doing something right. I know everyone won’t like everything I write everytime. But hey…I’m showing up. I’m working on it everyday. Why? Because this is my dream. And I will NOT let anyone’s opinion or criticism kill MY DREAM of being a W R I T E R!

Here is the excerpt from the book:

SOME PEOPLE HAVE BEEN DISCOURAGED FROM DREAMING BY OTHERS

Many people have had their dreams knocked right out of them! The world is filled with dream crushers and idea killers. Some people who aren’t pursuing any dreams of their own don’t like to see others pursuing theirs. Other people’s success makes them feel inadequate or insecure.

Business professors Gary Hamel and C.K. Prahalad wrote about an expirament conducted with a group of monkeys. Four monkeys were placed in a room that had a tall pole in the center. Suspended from the top of that pole was a bunch of bananas. One of the hungry monkeys started climbing the pole to get something to eat, but just as he reached out to grab a banana, he was doused with a torrent of cold water. Squeling, he scampered down the pole and abandoned his attempt to feed himself. Each monkey made a similar attempt, and each one was drenched with cold water. After making several attempts, they finally gave up.

The researchers removed one of the monkeys from the room and replaced him with a new monkey. As the newcomer began to climb the pole, the other three grabbed him and pulled him down to the ground. After trying to climb the pole several times and being dragged down by others, he finally gave up and never attempted to climb the pole again.

The researchers replaced the original monkeys, one by one, with new ones, and each time a new monkey was brought in, he would be dragged down by the others before he could reach the bananas. In time, only monkeys who had never received a cold shower were in the room, but none of them would climb the pole. They prevented one another from climbing, but none of them knew why.

Perhaps others have dragged you down in life. They’ve discouraged you from dreaming. Maybe they resented the fact that you wanted to move up or do something significant with your life. Or maybe they were trying to protect you from pain or disappointment. Either way, if you’ve been discouraged from dreaming, take heart. It’s never too late to start dreaming and pursuing your dreams.

-John C. Maxwell

I find it so insightful. Don’t let other people’s judgement and opinions stop you from going after your dreams just because they did. These monkeys got to the point where none of them even knew why they couldn’t go after the bananas. 🍌 They just deterred everyone else from going for them.

MY DREAM is to become a Master Storyteller, a Writer. And if it takes me my entire lifetime…I will persevere! I will create compelling content. I will be a Master Storyteller. And I hope I have inspired you to go after your dreams.

“Dreams come a size too big so that we can grow into them .”

-Josie Bisset

Don’t forget to leave your thoughts and comments below.

Works Cited

Cuban Mark: Only Morons Start A Business on A Loan . YouTube Video

Maxwell, C. John, Put Your Dream To The Test 10 Questions to Help You See It and Seize It

Meme Photo Source Credit: The Writer‘s Circle

Scott Steve, How to Form a New Habit (in 8 easy steps). Slide Share

Grito Mexicano

One of my favorite things to do is listen to rancheras y mariachi music y corridos y tu sabes…….todas las mas chingonas canciones Mexicana‘s.

It also brings back memories of my childhood when mi mamai escuchaba her favoritos grupos. I remember Los Temerarios, La Mafia, Vicente Fernandez, Yolanda Del Rio, y muchos mas, would be playing on any given morning.

Oh……and the smell of Pinesol! If the musica came on, that meant it was time to stop being a huevona and help mami clean the house.

Music is like a time machine…that only teleports you back to yesteryears. How I wish I could go back to when mi papi was alive. I really would love to see him happy again. And listening to his favorite corridos mas padres!

Some of you know what a Mexican grito is, but many of you may not know. Well I’m not really sure of a technical definition of it but I’ll try to explain it.

A grito is a “yell”,”scream”, or a “shout”that has to be belted out at the perfect time during a song that’s really captivating your entire soul and being.

It’s like the song has hypnotized you and you can feel multiple emotions throughout the song. Like feeling sadness, grief, aching, longing, longsuffering, pain, joy, happiness, valiant, strong, in love yet heartbroken, and more, all during the song.

The song is so powerful that it transcends the person listening and or singing. And I personally think it’s something every Mexican can do and that it was a gift given to us by our ancestors. No te creas! I don’t know…maybe I should go out and do a poll just to test my theory. But really, it’s not so hard, even los kids can do it.

I still listen to rancheras in the car with my own children. And I try to translate as much of the song as I can to my children.

I tell them about practicing their “gritos“, because this is tradition you know. And they must know, that the timing and execution of the grito is critical.

If you have never heard a grito you can search YouTube for some fun videos so you can witness the power of the grito.

So turn the musica on amigos y amigas. Let‘s pass down this valueable information to our hijas y hijos.

Becoming Me

At 24 years old I applied to the Institute of Children’s Literature. It has always been a dream of mine to publish a children’s book.

I had to send in a written essay. They read over the essays and select some applicants.

Well, I was so happy when I received my letter of acceptance saying that my essay impressed them.

Regrettably, I quit after my first assignment. I’m now 34 years old. Ten years have passed and I have started many projects and either quit them or failed them.

I hate revealing that about myself really. But I’m a pretty great “failure”. Or I should say I’m excellent at creating ideas and starting them, but I’m horrible at seeing them through.

At one point a family member told me to my face that she didn’t want to be “pathetic” like me. Effing OUCH!

Not that I expect everyone to want to emulate me anyway, but it still hurt.

It’s like, wait what? I didn’t think my life was so bad. I may not be where I thought I would be by now, but my life’s not that bad.

Booker T. Washington once said,

“Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome while trying to succeed.”

My dreams of being a writer would still be just a dream, had I not lost my dad in 2016. His death has shaken me to the core.

I have a new problem now. I feel like I can’t WASTE any time. And especially not another decade.

Obviously there were detours in my life, but how did I get so complacent and stagnant with my ambitions?

So here I am. It’s now the year 2017. Everyone is making resolutions. I don’t even begin to know what resolutions to make in my life….because I never complete them.

So if I make a few and accomplish any, I will consider it a success.

Deanna’s 2017 New Year’s Resolutions

Write 1 blog per week at minimum for my blog CANDID CHICANA.
Write my children’s books.
Revisit some of my incomplete projects that I still can’t let go of and finish or complete them.
Put down my cell phone in the company of friends(a new personal conviction of mine.
Play with my children, read to my children, and love every second I have with them.
Inspire and influence others in a positive way.

I can’t fret over my past, nor will I be discouraged by it. Instead, I will use all of it to mold me into a better me.

Do you have dreams that are hidden and long forgotten? Maybe it’s time for you to revisit those dreams….and go after them. After all, it will take action.

God bless you all this year! May 2017 be your year of prosperity!🎉🎊

Manifesting Your Self-fulfilling Prophecy

I first learned the concept of the self fulfilling prophecy in college. I believe it was during an Intro to Teaching course. Back when I thought I wanted to be a junior high teacher.

Self-fulfilling prophecy is a term coined by Robert Merton in 1948 to describe “a false definition of the situation evoking a new behavior which makes the originally false conception come true”(Bearman, Peter & Headstrom, Peter, pp 294-314). My own definition and explanation of a self-fulfilling prophecy can be summed up with the modern adage,

“Fake it,until you make it.”

I seriously must be the only person who just can’t figure out exactly what I want to be when I grow up (Mind you I’m about to turn 35 and I should have my sh** figured out by now). I just haven’t been able to commit to any one thing. Partly because I am interested in several fields of work.

Here’s a list of all of all the things I’ve said I wanted to be “when I grow up”:

Writer/News Reporter/Journalist,Junior High Reading Teacher,Counselor/Life Coach/Mental Health Specialist, Psychologist,Published Author (Genre: Children’s),Post-Secondary Educator:(Sociology)(Chicano/Ethnic Studies),Small Business Owner,Establishing a Private School,Literature or Language Arts Teacher.

Now that I AM grown up, my ambitions seem to be compounding in grandiosity . What I mean is…instead of being more practical, my ambitions seem to be growing and evolving into what seems to be an unobtainable dream. And they aren’t slowing down or diminishing in area.

My revised list of what I want to be when I grow up has changed. My new list includes:

Magazine Creator, Blogger, Social Media Marketer/Content Marketer, Philanthropist, Newspaper Creator, 🎥 Film/Video/Documentary Maker, Marketing Manager.

The only conclusion that I can come to is that no matter which road I choose, I will be doing exactly what I am meant to be doing. And that is storytelling. Therefore I do hereby declare myself a storyteller with the potential to become a Master Storyteller.

My personal self fulfilling prophecy is that I will become a Master Storyteller. It will seem effortless only because it is MY calling. I am ready to map out some of my goals and create a new ten year goal sheet for my fabulous future. I am ready for my masterpiece manifestation in the art of storytelling.

What are some of your grandiose dreams and ambitions? Better yet what do you want to be when YOU grow up? Or have you already been fortunate to land your dream job?

Whether you have your dream job or not, why not set some self-fulfilling prophecies for yourself? They can be personal, professional, educational, or for any other areas of your life. Please share some of them with me in the comments section.

Let me leave you with a famous quote that I love by the Victorian novelist, George Eliot:

“It is never too late to be what you might have been.”

–George Elliot

Now go out and conquer the world my friends.

To contact me:

dstatam63@bethelu.edu

candidchicana@gmail.com

My Image: Deanna Guadalupe Montalvo

Works Cited:

(Fake it) Unknown author

George Eliot. (n.d.) BrainyQuote.com Retrieved December 4, 2016, from BrainyQuote.com website: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/g/georgee

The Oxford Handbook of Analytical Sociology, ed. Peter Bearman and Peter Headstrom, Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2009, pp294-314.

Mis Padres, My Parents!

After I got home from work the other night, I called my mami. Earlier that day I had been having a rough time. I had many things troubling me. So I told her the details of my day and asked her some questions.

I was hoping that she could offer some encouragement and would have some input for me. So I was a little crushed when she just responded,

“I don’t know mija“.

There was an awkward silence after her response. I just smiled though because it was ok. I know she’s still grieving the loss of my papi (daddy).

I wasn’t crushed because she didn’t have an awnser, but because I really just needed reassuring responses. Or better yet if I could just have one more of those candid conversations I used to have with mi papi.

Mi papi would have these deep, thought provoking replies. He always knew just what to say.There was never a right or wrong answer. He just always had a well thought out message. His wisdom probably credited to the life experiences he had.

As I previously shared in my bio page post, I lost mi papi in July. My dad somehow knew that I didn’t really need an answer to these questions (because there is no ONE awnser). He knew I just needed to engage in a philosophical conversation. He was brilliant at helping me to understand “life”. Gosh I miss him so much! I still cry everyday.

I feel like I am constantly trying to talk about him. I’m always finding any reason to bring him up (So if it’s annoying, I apologize). Hopefully, what I say is inspiring and not irritating.

Now don’t get me wrong about my mom. She’s smart too. I call her a “Jane of all trades”. She is skilled in many ways. She’s entrepreneurial. She DIY’s and I’m not only talking about crafts and glue gun type. I’m talking about ordering Auto Zone and Oreilys Auto Parts kind and being her own mechanic. She really has superhero strengths 💪.

My mother is my only living parent now, so I will be scrutinizing everything she does and how she does it (And being the nerd that I am, I’ll probably write notes to help me remember for future reference). Not in a negative and critical sense but just in an awe and respectful sense.

It brings a smile to my face, knowing that I see a combination of the traits of both my parents in myself. I feel like I inherited mi papi’s intellectual and philosophical curiosity and mi mami’s creativity and entrepeneurial gusto.

During their formative years, my parents both dropped out of middle school; my dad in Mexico, and my mom in America. I wish I would have inquired a little more about their extenuating circumstances. I’m sure we talked about it some. I regret not having written any of it down, for my memory fails me now.

I now have to fill that vacant space someway. I have to find other people who are willing to have these candid conversations with me. That’s hard to do in this day in age because everyone is busy in life, or caught up on social media such as Facebook (Whom I myself have become victim to frequently).

Perhaps this blog I’ve created will be a little outlet, and a way to fill that vacancy. I enjoy using my creativity to challenge myself in this way. I love words and writing. I’m on a learning adventure everyday of my life. I meet people with incredible stories and I pray that one day they will let me share their stories as well.

Feel free to chime in. Obviously my blog and my writing won’t be everyone’s cup of tea. But hopefully in some way I can encourage others to pursue their passions. I want to hear your thoughts. Tell me the good, the bad, and the ugly.

So my parting thought and message for this post is,

Honor your mother and father. Remember to call your parents tonight. Thank them for all they have sacrificed. Most importantly don’t forget to tell them you love them.

–Deanna Guadalupe Montalvo

I’m not trying to be bossy or sound condescending. I’m just a little jealous because I can’t call mi papi anymore. I sure will be calling my mom though.

If you don’t have your parents to talk to anymore. Please don’t be sad. Email me. I will read your stories and engage in philosophical (or any candid) type of conversations with you.

I hope you like reading my stories and snippets of life as well. If you do please follow my blog. And if you don’t that’s quite alright too.

To contact me:

dstatam63@bethelu.edu

candidchicana@gmail.com

My Photo: “Papi & Mami” Jose Guadalupe Montalvo, Gloria Anna Montalvo

5 Simple Ways To Preserve & Pass Down Our Culture To Our Children

CONVERSATION Have your children talk to their aunts, uncles, and grandparents. Some of my own fondest memories are candid conversations that I had with my father. Many of my beliefs have been formed and shaped simply from the talks that I remember having with him.
READ Read to your children, and let them read to you. Intentionally pick out books that they can relate to. Choose books that educate them about their own culture.
RESEARCH Go on the internet to search for information about your own culture. My daughters and I love to do this and often find ourselves diverted on several rabbit trails. It’s fun and educational. Anything from articles to YouTube videos.
PROMINENT PEOPLE Study prominent people with your children. Are their people in your own family that played important roles in history? Perhaps a grandparent fought in a war. Interview them and make a video for the family keepsakes. Whether war stories, or just ramblings of their own childhood memories…these are the words that influence and impact our children.
WRITE Have your children reflect and write their memories and experiences. I can recall my parents taking me to Mexico to visit my grandparents when I was only a child. Many of my ideas for writing have come from that trip alone. The featured image up above, is of my abuelitos (my paternal grandparents) from Mexico.

What other ways can you think of to pass down and preserve our family history?

Contact me at: