Candid Chicana Blog

12 Little Known Ways, To Make Magical Memories With Your Children

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“It is not enough to give what we have; we must also give what we are.”

It is during the most mundane part of our day, that we find ourselves lost in the monotony of life. We wake up, we go to work, and we take care of the family in between. We repeat this vicious cycle: Wake up. Go to work. Go home. Go to bed. Wake up. Do it all over again. Before you know it, the year has passed. Then two years zoom by. Astonishingly, the next thing you know, 2 years turns to 7. Eventually an entire decade flashes by!

As you sit there, reflecting over how the time has slipped away from you, and thinking to yourself,

“Where has the time gone?”

Before you have time to start mulling over your many regrets, missed opportunities, and failures, instead glance over at your growing munchkins! Sit there and observe every little intricate detail about them. Admire their growing little bodies. They are your life. They are your treasure. They are your most valuable possession! Savor this life!

Parents, do not allow the weight of the world to poison you! Eh! We have daily battles. Much to our dismay, our little rugrats can become a nuisance, compounding to our ever present stress. Additionally, we become burdened with bills and problems. Every day the stress snowballs out of our control. Consequently, during these trials, we fail to realize that our children just want to play with us. They don’t understand job layoffs, divorces, and other adult catastrophes. Children want to know they are loved and protected.

Therefore, rid yourself from the urge to solve all of life’s problems overnight, and just spend time with your children. If there is anything I know for sure, it’s that children will remember whether you had time for them. My parents were dirt poor and yet they always made time for us. Furthermore, it didn’t matter to me one bit that we lived in an efficiency rather than a fancy house. It mattered to me that my mami always figured out how to have a hot meal for us. Even when she had to use a propane tank to cook our meals. Yes! A propane tank! Lord knows I am thankful for frijoles y tortillas. I’m a proud frijolera!

Loving parents are never too PROUD to do whatever it takes to PROVIDE for their children. Laboriosly, they research for how to retrieve the things the family desperately needs. God just blesses parents with that cadaver dog instinct. It’s in their DNA. They can find all of their needs. They make a way! Therefore, do not worry about the upcoming winter and all of the seasonal stress, and the bills. Do not panic because the kids are growing like weeds and need new clothes. Rest easy in the knowledge that everything will be ok. It always is. Christmas will be here before you know it, and if you just REMEMBER these 12 ways to make magical memories with your children, it just might relieve some of that seasonal stress.

  1. Learn Together- Help them with School Work And Or Homeschooling
  2. Worship God Together- At Home, Church, In the Car, Anywhere
  3. Devotional Times- Family Prayers, Reading Bible Together, Studying & Discussing The Word Of God, Memorizing Scriptures
  4. Playing- Watching the children play, and or joining them, Build Forts, Castles, Pretend Play
  5. Singing- Music is magical! Let them sing. Sing with them. Invite the neighbors too!
  6. Gardening- Grow things together: Plants, Veggies, Fruits, Flowers, whatever!!!
  7. Eating- Eat together as a family. For a more magical memory, set the table and enjoy dinner at the family table together.
  8. Read- Read books to them. Let them read books to you. Read books to each other. Invite the grandparents to read to them. Record those memories on video and make it a family keepsake/heirloom.
  9. Current Events- Have conversations with your children about what is going on in the world. Let’s bring up kids who give a damn! They really are our future.
  10. Movie Night- Family Flicks & Popcorn Night (My personal favorite and one I plan to implement weekly this year)
  11. Baking/Cooking- Cook together. Bake together. And teach them to share with the less fortunate. Feed someone who is hungry.
  12. Start A Family Business- Teach them about budgeting money, finances, and being good stewards.

Now, don’t fret about tomorrow my friends. Worry only about today. God Be With You!

The more love we share with everyone, the more loveable we become

Quotations Taken From:

Anthony, Robert Dr. THINK BIG, A Think Collection, Berkley 1999

OLGA CASTILLO, Born To Box

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https://candidchicanachronicles.blog/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/fb_img_1498875950312.jpg

I had the most honorable privilege of becoming aquianted with a remarkable woman. Olga Castillo, a 43 year old woman, and grandmother, who shared with me that she is a boxer. Y, orgullamente es Chicana tambien!😍

It was inspirational to hear her story, that I asked her to share all of the most intimate details with me, so that I could share it on my blog. I love women empowerment and this story just embodies all of that woman power!

Olga started boxing at the age of 33. She has been boxing for a decade now. She says she started out by learning the basics and worked her way into competing in matches.

Olga confided with me that she had experienced some hardships in her life and that she was already “FIGHTING ALONE.”

She decided to join, because boxing is in her blood. Admittedly, she confesses that boxing is her therapy.

Maybe to you and I that sounds a little unorthodox, but after you hear the circumstances she endured, it makes sense that she would turn to boxing, a formerly male dominated blood sport, and destroy that fallacy with all her poder.

Women…belong in the ring! Especially if that is where they choose to be.

So let us go back a little.

Horrifically, Olga was molested by her own brother as a young girl. This in turn caused her to feel like she didn’t have a voice. She grew up to be shy and understandably a little insecure.

Once a married adult, she found herself trapped in an abusive marriage for 4 years. In these dark years, she was beaten by the very person who had vowed to love her and cherish her. Thus too, contributing to her insecurity.

One source says, “Sadly, one out of three women are victims of domestic violence. And these women come from all walks of life-yes, all! Whether rich or poor, young or old, whether educated or not, employed or not, religious or not, abuse abides by no boundaries.”(Hunt,June)

I myself, have become disheartened to learn about how bad women are really treated….all over the world. It’s like God has given me a revelation about something that has always been there…but I never paid attention at the severity of it.

Olga says that overcoming her past was the deeper fight. With boxing, she fought to find her voice. She says that with each hit and each punch to the bag, her voice gets louder and louder.

With boxing she has learned to stand up for herself. She is no longer insecure. She is a role model to all the young women who want to pursue boxing as a sport.

Boxing has helped build up her self-esteem, confidence, and strength. She now can stand up for herself and others. And most importantly she found that inner power within herself, that she credits boxing, for giving that back to her.

Check out her boxing moves in the ring in the link below.

https://youtu.be/9ETFT6f6hjU

Olga says the toughest part is staying focused in the ring. She encourages all women to give boxing a try. It was once a male dominated sport, but women have taken it to the Olympics. Which is a big thing!

You never know, you might like it.

She Fights!

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Most of our lives are about proving something, either to ourselves or to someone else.

Ok so I am giving a little sneak peak at what I am working on for my next blog.
It has two to three underlying themes that I really want to cover. I am really excited about this one.

Obviously “boxing” is a dead giveaway with the photo attached, but there’s more to this sport than meets the eye. Stay tuned in the next weeks as I wrap up my research.

Works Cited:

Quote taken from:

Anthony, Robert Dr. THINK BIG A Think Collection. Berkley Publishing. August 1999.

Photo Credits:

Olga Castillo

A Story About How Benevolent Giving Impacts Communities

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You will find, as you look back upon your life, that the moments that stand out are the moments when you have done things for others

-Henry Drummond

From The Treasure Chest

Papi use to tell me stories about growing up in poverty in Mexico. I remember how he would chastise and lecture us about our wastefulness.

He would shake his head with disapproval if we were being wasteful, and then would proceed to tell us about his experiences as a young boy in Mexico.

He would tell us that he was so poor that even as a 15 year old boy…he didn’t have shoes to wear. He would get teased and bullied by other kids at school because he didn’t have shoes.

To make matters worse…he would work out in the heat to help abuelito. With no shoes, I can’t even begin to imagine what the hot dirt did to his feet. Blister and burn him for sure.

He would tell us his stories with pride. He knew he had worked hard. They would pay him with livestock. He was giddy about a pig he earned once.

That was how it was back then. People didn’t have money, so…they bartered. They would “borrow” my Papi for field hands and manual labor…but pay him with what they had.

Papi didn’t tell us this because he wanted sympathy or empathy. Rather, he used this as a life lesson to teach us that we should be good stewards of everything we have. If he caught us being wasteful, we would hear about it.

I was blessed to have him as my Papi for 60 years. In those years I have many fond memories. Some of my favorite, are when he would take clothes and supplies to his family in Mexico. He even managed to buy trucks and take them to his brothers in Mexico.

I remember we would put a camper on the truck and load it up with boxes and boxes of clothes in the back.

I even remember when we took the clothes to an impoverished town to deliver the clothes. I will never ever forget what I saw and how I felt.

I saw my Papi calling all the people out to the truck. Papi had left the camper at the rancho. So the people just hopped right on the bed of the truck and began digging through the clothes. Smiling, laughing, and, taking what they could use.

I felt happy to see people were so elated to receive used clothes. I felt proud that my Papi loved his gente so much, and that he had a big heart for giving. He never forgot about his people.

To this day…I am inspired when I see mi gente buying ropa and zapatos y mas to take to Mexico. I work at a thrift store and am lucky to meet many amazing people.

Not just Mexican people, but many other cultures too. I have seen African women buying in bulk to send to Africa. And many others too.

One day a lady came to my register to check out. I struck up a conversation with her and discovered that she was making her purchase as a ministry gift to the impoverished people in remote areas in Mexico.

I got excited when she told me about her planned trip to make the delivery. I was so happy to hear this because it brought back many memories of my trips to Mexico with goods to deliver to familia and the poor.

I asked the lady to take lots of pictures and to please remember to come back and show me. Well several months passed by.

Then one day the lady came back into the store. Honestly, I didn’t think she would come back, although I hoped she would.

She showed me her photos. We talked and we cried. I listened to her tell about her experience and how thankful the people were. She was so impacted by the people that she said she would do another trip.

They asked her for food. But she said it’s very difficult to bring food from US to Mexico because of restrictions. But she wants to raise funds so that when she is in Mexico next time, she can bring them food too.

I have shared her gofund me link after this post so that you can read her story and maybe you will feel led to make a charitable contribution to her personal ministry in helping the poor.

Or perhaps you can just remember to give when and where you can. If you can’t give goods or funds….please….give kindness. Give your time by volunteering when you can.

Kindness is free. But nobody uses it anymore. I am very disheartened by the callousness of people’s hearts and actions these days.

This topic has been on my heart lately. I am not a perfect woman. I make mistakes. But I am proud that I had parents who taught me to give.

Parents that, despite being dirt poor, were able to bless many many people. I pray that I can be as kind a person as my parents. As kind as this good samaritan lady.

God doesn’t look at the size of your giving. He just wants you to give what you can. I learned from one of my favorite books, The Blessed Life, by Robert Morris, that you can’t outgive God. This book has the best teaching on the subject of giving and tithing. I recommend it to everyone any chance I get.

No matter what or how much you contribute, your giving has a positive impact. I pray that God would bless both the givers and the receivers, for we never know on which end we will be.

https://www.gofundme.com/37itjc0

Works Cited:

Morris, Robert. The Blessed Life

Wallis. L. Charles, The Treasure Chest. 1965. Harper & Row Publishers Inc. 49 East 33rd Street ,New York 16, N.Y.

5 Ways To Obliterate Idleness

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The hours we waste are golden hours

And stand for money lost,

For every idle minute spent

We have to meet the cost

The man who wastes two hours a day

Has hindered his career,

And shortened up his working time

Six hundred hours per year.

–Author Unknown

It has been frustrating in the past few weeks to find the free time to write for my blog and to work on my writing projects. Being a full time working mom has left me little to no time to practice my craft.

In the past weeks I would end up writing until 3 or 4 a.m. in the morning after being at work all day. That was already taking its toll on my body and leaving me sleep deprived.

Fortunately for me, I have some amazing employers who have come up with a brilliant revised schedule. One that will allow me, and the other shift manager, to rotate on a much better schedule. It’s like one week of Hades, and one week of Hawaii vacay.

That’s excellent news for me….because that’s 6 days of free time now. I am excited to finally have my most coveted resource, TIME! Time, so that I can finally write my children’s books.

I have made myself a little list of helpful tips to keep me on track with my goals. With some modifications, I am sure anyone can apply it to their own goals.

  1. Create A Work Space For Yourself – A space for yourself to do what you do. Whether you need a shop to do mechanical work on cars, or you need a sewing room to design clothes, make a space for yourself! I have been waiting to find a little desk so that I can do my writing. Finally, a few nights ago I came across one. Already I have more motivation to write, than I did before. Previously, I was trying to accomplish my writing goals on the sofa, bed, and even, the floor. Not ideal in the least. The key is to make and find “your space”. Gradually you can begin to personalize it with all of your special tools and create a more functional environment later.
  2. Have A Written Plan- Keep a little notebook or binder with your plans. As I have gotten older, the less I can remember off the top of my memory. Therefore I must rely on; apps, calendars, task lists, sticky notes, notebooks,etc…Don’t worry it’s normal! That just means we have a lot of people relying on us. Our brains are overloaded with information. So invest in the right tools of your trade.
  3. Eliminate Time-Wasters– Social media is the number one culprit in my case. Give yourself some restrictions and or rewards. For example in my case I might say, After I write and publish my blog post, I may log onto social media. In another example, a mechanic might buy some special tool from Amazon as a reward for fixing 5 cars. I don’t know….you will create your own little rules and rewards to accomadate your special needs.
  4. Use The Time Wisely- For me, I think just establishing a certain time/hour for me to write consistently, will be my key to success. Once you have your space and your tools, all that’s left is you! You have to do the work.
  5. Track Progress/Measurements- My personal way of tracking my own progress is aligned with my new years resolutions I made in January. I could make a new tracker, but honestly I want to keep it simple and achievable.

So there you have it! 5 ways to obliterate idleness. Let me know what type of space you have. Leave comments below. Or share your pics.

Works Cited

Quote taken from:

Braude’s, M., Jacob. 1965. Complete Speaker‘s And Toastmasters Library. Rhyme And Verse – To Help Make A Point. Prentice-Hall, Inc. Englewood Cliffs, N.J.

Good People – (Part Two) Gale Sayers – Former Chicago Bears Runningback & Philanthropist

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Anyone who knows me, knows that I don’t know anything about football. Or any sport for that matter. (Forgive me) But…one thing I do know, is good people when I meet them.

And I do come across them everyday in my daily interactions at work, and out in my community. So let me tell you how I learned about a great football legend named Gale Sayers.

A man who is the epitome of good people. Not just because of his fame, but also for his “active philanthropy.” He was, and still is good people.

I learned about Gale Sayers through my coworker Gary (who by the way is also good people). Gary is the son of the legendary football player 🏈.

I have discovered that telling other peoples stories is a new favorite pastime of mine.

Even though I have never had a favorite football team, I now have a favorite football player. That is Mr.Gale Sayers.

And while most of the world is fascinated with him because of his impressive footbal status, I on the other hand, am more impacted by the other aspects of the mans life.

Gale Sayers was drafted by the Chicago Bears in 1965. He played from 1965 to 1971. According to an article published on CSPN, he still holds these records: the record for most touchdowns by a rookie (22), the highest kickoff return average (30.6 yards per return), and is tied for the most touchdowns in a game by a single player (six).

After watching a few YouTube videos, to learn more about him, I began reading the comments. I like to read comments because it gives me a little insight into other people’s thoughts and it helps me formulate my own opinion.

One commentor said, “Sayers was the kind of graceful athlete whose work became fine art.” and, “…everyone said he is beautiful to watch.”Another commentor said, he is like “artwork in motion.”

In the Gale Sayers Biography, I learned that he is the youngest football player inducted into the professional football Hall of Fame. At the age of 34.

Before he was in the NFL, he played college football at the University of Kansas and was known as “The Kansas Comet.”

Unfortunately after a football injury, his career came to a screeching halt. Gale Sayers never fully recovered despite having knee surgery.

Now here comes the parts of his life that interest me a little more.

In 1967 he was the roomate of another football player named Brian Piccolo. Brian Piccolo is white and Gale Sayers is African American. This caused a little rukus because of the segregation still happening at the time.

“They were roomates, but could not go out in public and eat a meal comfortably during a period when barriers of racial segregation had yet to be fully dismantled.”

Despite the chaos happening with the civil rights movement and all of the racial tension, Gale and Brian became good friends. They both played the same position. This usually led players to have a more rivalry relationship between players. But not these two guys.

Sadly both of these remarkable men had short football careers. Brian developed lung cancer and died shortly after. Gale never fully recovered from his injury.

But the loss of his good friend Brian had an intense impact on him. There was a movie created to depict their friendship. The film is called Brian‘s Song. Gale also wrote a book about putting others before yourself in a book called I Am Third.

Mr. Gale Sayers became an active supporter of many organizations such as The Boys & Girls Clubs of America, The Boy Scouts, and The American Cancer Association. He also formed the Gale Sayers Foundation in 2007, with the aim of providing educational opportunities for underprivileged children.

Pastor T.L.McBeth who resides in Fort Worth, Texas said that “Gale Sayers was a people person. He didn’t forget where he came from. He always found the time to help people and to talk to them.”

Featured below is Mr.Sayers speech. His words are inspiring no matter who you are. Black or white, young or old, Man, Woman, or child.

God gave me a great gift and I had a lot of developing for this occasion. Reaching this point, however, is not as important as striving to get here. This is true in all professions and all of life’s activities. There are doctors, lawyers, schoolteachers, plumbers all who strive to do their very best with their abilities. We hear a lot today about how the American people have lost their dedication to excellence. I don’t believe that is true. Each of us excels at different things, sometimes in areas that are only a hobby, more often in our life vocation. The most important thing however, is to strive to do our very best. Nothing is more of a waste than unrealized potential.”-Gale Sayers

Works Cited

Ott,Tim.,Gale Sayers Biography, The Biography.Com, URL: http://www.biography.com/people/gale-sayers-9472953.

Sibor,Doug.,A History of NFL Running Back Careers Ruined By Injury

Gale Sayers Speech Taken From http://www.encyclopedia.com/people/sports-and-games/sports-biographies/gale-sayers.

Good People | Buena Gente – Part One

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A very frequent colloqiualism I heard growing up in the Mexican community, was:

“El/Ella es buena gente.” Which basically translates to: “He/She is good people.”

I also read that “good people”is not proper English. It is considered Black Slang in A Dictionary of Afro-American Talk by Clarence Major 1971 1513N.

I recently celebrated my 35th birthday on February 13. I am so blessed that in these 35 years I have had the privilege to meet some really “buena gente”,”good people.”

The reason I first started my blog was because I lost the most “buena gente” person that I knew. My papi.He passed on to eternal glory in July of 2016.

He was truly “good people.” He was brave, intellectual, empathetic, resilient, kind, he had a sense of humor, and so many other things.

As I have previously written, I miss our candid talks the most. Towards the end of his life he was just too ill, to have one more talk with me.

And although I desperately wanted to ask him to, I refrained myself from doing so. He was suffering greatly and I didn’t want to be selfish.

I think that’s what I mourn the most. That I can never fill that void. That I can never talk to him again. I mean he can hear me, but I can’t hear him.

Maybe that’s why my blog is the prescription that I need to give me a little bit of pain relief.

He was the only one who would listen to me. I mean really listen to the words I was saying. Then he would THINK about his response.

He would give me sound, rational advice. He just always knew what to say. I never know what to say or how to say it, hence the reason I try to write it instead.

Now that my dad is gone my joy comes from meeting all the “good people” in the world that I come across.

It makes me happy when I meet someone (especially complete strangers) who are willing to chat up a storm about whatever strikes our fancy.

I love to see their raw emotions. I love to find a way to connect with them. I enjoy listening to them tell me their stories. And I get excited to share them with you.

I hope you continue to follow my blog because in part 2 of my “Good People” “Buena Gente” Blog Mini Series, I will be sharing with you the story about how I met the son of a Former NFL Hall of Fame’r who is the epitome of ” good people.”

This is one story you won’t want to miss.

I dedicate this mini series to my loving father. My hero. Jose Guadalupe Montalvo. You are greatly loved and missed Papi. I hope I make you proud. I love you! This February, this “love” month, I will share my love by telling the stories of these “good people” with the world. Even if I’m only reaching 60 people right now.

It is not what he has, nor even what he does, which directly expresses the worth of a man, but what he is.

-Henri Frederic Amiel

A Crazy Myth Writers Need To Kill

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Im reading The Audacity to be a Writer: 50 Inspiring Articles on WRITING that Could Change Your LIFE.

This book is a compilation of articles by Bryan Hutchinson and many other contributing authors.

Tonight I’m reading the article titled: A Crazy Myth Writers Need To Kill.

This particular article is right on time.

I have been doubting myself and my writing”talent”. I have produced about a dozen blog posts for my blog Candid Chicana since I started in Nov of 2016. The problem is that I hate them all. I feel like I need to go back and tweek, fix, edit, rewrite, change, omit, and revise every single one of them. I’m so dissatisfied that I even contemplated deleting them entirely and starting over.

Most writers probably doubt their skills and abilities. I think that is because they obssess about being good writers. They tend to be the harshest critic on themselves. And with good reason. They passionately care about the quality of their work.

According to Hutchinson,”Simply because some people tell you that you need to know everything about writing doesn’t mean you need to know everything, at least not the way they do. If you buy into such assertations, Writer’s Doubt will eat you up and spit you out.(Hutchinson, Bryan pp.20.)

The Myth:

  • You need to be an expert in all aspects of writing to be a writer.

The Truth:

  • “You don’t need to be a grammar master, you don’t need to know everything about punctuation, and you don’t need to be able to teach English 101. Sure it’s great if you can, but it’s not necessary.”

He compares Stephen King and Danielle Steel, both whom are bestselling authors. King received a B.A. in English in 1970 and published his first novel, Carrie in 1974. Steel never studied writing in school yet she is the fourth bestselling author alive today, with over 800 million copies of her book sold to date.

This has reassured me that it’s okay if I don’t know it all. That I am not required to know it all in order to be a writer. The only real requirement, is to W R I T E! I know I have to work on the mechanics of my writing, but that’s a daily process. Each day I learn more and more and immerse myself in the process.

I don’t have to compete or compare myself with anyone. I just have to do what I love. I just have to write. At the end of the day if I really am an awful writer, there’s still hope for me.

Charles Dickens and Mark Twain were both dropouts and still managed to succeed. There’s hope for me ya’ll! If you are still clicking on my blogs, I thank you very much. Perhaps one day I will write something really profound. I pray that I do.

Thank you for reading my blog.

Leave comments or thoughts below. Let me know if you have suggestions for me or writing tips and advice. I’ll take all the knowledge that I can get. If you have book suggestions please post them in the comment section as well. Better yet, tell me what books you are reading.

Goodnight folks.

Work Cited: Hutchinson, Bryan, The Audacity to be a Writer, 50 Inspiring Articles on WRITING that Could Change Your LIFE. 2015.